See No Evil

I was in the checkout line at the supermarket yesterday and noticed that in addition to a couple of candy-free checkstands there was now a couple of 'Child Friendly Checkouts'.  Apparently some parents don't want their precious little snowflakes seeing the moral decay represented by magazine covers.  The store (as far as I know this is an individual store thing and not chain-wide) has printed up and laminated green signs that cover all of the magazines and state that this is, indeed, a child-friendly checkout.  Now, okay, I can live with that if the magazines they are covering up are Maxim or Playgirl but we are talking about my faves, People, OK, Star, Us Weekly!!!!

I mean, the stories are trashy and morally decayed and if I had a six-year-old I probably wouldn't want her to read them.  But the cover pictures are not really racy.  I think this is a case of too much coddling of the precious snowflakes.

On the other hand, covering up Oprah, More and AARP may not be such a bad idea. (And I know they don't sell the AARP magazine in stores.  Don't ask me how I know.)  But Oprah and Goldie and Jamie Lee, all of these women with whom I share a decade.  All looking fabulous.  Maybe some young - er - ish - middle-aged women don't want to see these beautiful women.  Maybe it makes them feel bad about themselves.  If I do say so myself I look damn good for my age but I also know when the wrinkling and sagging does set in, I don't have the money to get it repaired. So here's to the 'Young - er - ish - Middle Aged Women Friendly Checkout.'  Do you think they could fit that on a sign?