Saturday, October 17, 2009

Being Taken to Dinner or Being Arrested?

I can't decide it it looks like we are being driven to dinner or being arrested in some 1930's time warp. We are actually being driven to dinner in a 1939 Cadillac limousine by our very dapper driver, Malcolm. This was part of our weekend package at White Rocks Inn in Vermont last weekend.

Dinner at the Victorian Inn was amazingly good (but not even close to Weight Watchers friendly). We both had escargots as a starter. Karl had rack of lamb and I had duck - both perfectly cooked. Dessert was creme brulee for Karl and chocolate mousse for me. The chef who owns the restaurant is outstanding, formerly executive chef at the Kennedy Center. I highly recommend having a meal there.

Pix from Vermont last weekend




I am a Horrible Blogger

Last post was 7/25 - pitiful

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Motherzillas, Bridezillas, and the Best Wedding Video

Unless you live under a rock you have seen this video in the last day or so.


I confess I have watched it several times and every time it makes me smile and cry and just pretty much makes me happy.

This is pretty much how a wedding should go - happiness, celebration and pure unbridled joy.

I kind of have unique perspective, having officiated at a few in a past life. While the ones I participated in never really reached epic Bridezilla levels (btw, who are these people and what makes them think that because it is 'their day' the world needs to revolve around them and they can be rude and abusive to everyone - and why don't the grooms have sense enough to run screaming from these crazy women? And more importantly, how long do you think these marriages actually last?), especially the rehearsals were fraught with tension, tears, and this whacked out sense that everything had to be absolutely perfect..and the world as we know it would end if the bridesmaids spacing as they walked down the aisle was not perfect.

Often the culprit was not the bride herself but the bride's mother. After my first rehearsal when a tiny flowergirl and ringbearer who couldn't have been more than three years old were reduced to tears because they couldn't understand the concept that the flowergirl was not to begin walking until the ringbearer had passed six pews in the church and they wanted to walk together (and I'm not sure they could even count to six) that I instituted a few rules, I probably said them a bit nicer but the general jist was this:

1. I was in charge of the rehearsal. I had met previously with the bride and groom and had a good sense of what they wanted and they knew going in that this was a rule. Suggestions for changes during the rehearsal had to come through the bride and groom. All my brides mentioned afterwards that they appreciated this so much because their mothers had been driving them crazy.

2. Since it was obvious in some cases that the party had started long before the rehearsal and there wasn't a chance in hell that anyone would remember where to stand when the time came, I used the old theater trick of masking tape on the floor to indicate their marks. Simple: find the X with your name on it and stand there.

3. The third rule was the most important. Relax - remember why you are here and this is just 30 minutes of the rest of your life and stuff may go wrong. The groomsman may wake up with an ear infection causing such vertigo that he spends the wedding time in the ER instead of the church. The videographer's equipment may fall with such an impressive crash it sounded like a bomb. A passing thunderstorm my make you have to scream your vows so folks can hear them. There is a lot you can't control in this 30 minutes as well as in life. What better time to have things go to hell when you have your family and friends around supporting you.

All that said, I would have loved to work with the couple in the video. They truly seemed to understand that the day was about joy and happiness and dancing and not whether the flowers were a shade off, or the fake eyelashes were falling off, or the flowergirl could not count to six.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

19 Days to Japan

In honor of upcoming Japan trip Demetria sent me this link to crazy Japanese commercials. Enjoy

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Racial Profiling - Harvard Style

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/20/henry-louis-gates-jr-arre_n_241407.html

There is so much wrong with this incident it's hard to list them all.

I may not know all my neighbors personally but I recognize them and would not call the police if I saw one of them trying to get into their own house.

It is neither unreasonable nor illegal to ask a police officer for his/her name and badge number. Dr. Gates provided his identification. The officer was obligated to provide his information.

It is neither unreasonable nor illegal to become angry when confronted by the police in one's own home for trying to unstick the front door. Especially after a long flight from China. One wonders if the cop has flown anywhere lately - or ever.

We may have an African-American president who happened to have graduated from Harvard Law but we still have a long, long way to go. Harvard does not have a great recent record - a professor questioned for simply walking across Harvard Yard; an African-American woman denied the degree she earned because someone from the old neighborhood showed up on campus dealing drugs and killed someone. I will not argue that was a horrible crime but I can't help but wonder if this young woman had been a rich white legacy student and a friend from her rich white neighborhood showed up and killed someone in a drug deal gone wrong the outcome would have been different. I'm guessing the legacy would have gotten his/her degree and there would have been some kind of cover-up.

Dr. Gates deserves an apology from the Cambridge PD. They were way out of line and Dr. Gates' reaction was completely understandable. and anyone who argues that this incident wasn't racially motivated is lying or stupid.


Sunday, July 19, 2009

Sashimi



This is what I am craving at the moment.

I am hesitant to eat much raw fish here in America but in Japan I can't get enough. And here is the kicker. A year or so ago there was an article in Vanity Fair about the fish auction in Tokyo. It seems like all that lovely raw tuna that is so fabulous in Japan but that I have serious doubts about in Connecticut starts it journey at the fish auction in my hometown, Gloucester, Massachusetts. Then it goes to the airport where it is flown to Tokyo and sold to the restaurants. All this travel doesn't seem to affect the freshness and overall deliciousness of the fish.

So that makes me wonder if I should be less concerned here; but then I wonder if what we get here travels back from Japan. That could be too much flying for the fish. And then there is the issue of volume. Not many people around here will eat raw fish so it is likely to sit around longer getting that not-so-fresh fish funk.

At any rate, in about three weeks I will be in Japan and will be able to satisfy my craving. Maybe some of the fish I will be eating when I get there will be on the same flight over.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Can You Spell P-H-O-T-O-S-H-O-P?

Even though this is a horrifically bad picture (I was juggling the grocery scanner and the iPhone), this has got to qualify for one of the worst photoshop jobs EVER!!

Suffice it to say if that body actually belongs to Khloe Kardashian, then I am Twiggy - Twiggy from the 60's Carnaby Street era - not Twiggy from ANTM.

I didn't know there was a Khloe Kardashian bobble-head.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Maddow vs. Buchanan - last night MSNBC

Great exchange last night when Pat Buchanan tried to convince Rachel Maddow that white men 'deserve' preference in American life because 100% white men signed the Declaration of Independence, blah, blah, blah. Rachel is amazing in how she handles his raving lunacy.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Thoughts on 'Retirement"'

Karl turns 62 in October and we have been talking about retirement. I have lots of mixed feelings.

Old people retire. I don't consider us old. But retirement, for all its good points, raises the issue or mortality and I'm not ready for either of us to be mortal just yet.

It would be nice to have entire days and weeks to do whatever we want, on no one's schedule but our own. To go away for a week and only have to consider boarding the dog rather than boarding the dog and what stage my work projects are at and who will see Karl's patients and how many paid time off days we have left and is this a wise use of them because what if we have to use them for sick time.

I have always said I didn't want to end up like my mother. She died at age 75 and was still working full-time. Since she lived alone, the only indication that something had happened was she didn't show up for work. While it was good that her co-workers drove over to check on her and called the police when they found her apartment locked and her car in the driveway, it was bad that she never had a break from work to develop a hobby she could enjoy or travel or just spend a day at the beach with a book.

Then there is the age thing. Karl is eight years older and while that's not really a significant difference it does make the mathematics of retirement a bit trickier. We both would like to be able to have time together, to enjoy ourselves, and to do things, travel especially, while we are still healthy and active. But if I retire at 62, I get significantly less Social Security than if I work until 67. But when I am 62, Karl is already 70 and when I am 67, he's 75. Clearly there are no guarantees but things seem more tenuous when your age has a 7 as the first number - and yes, I know, people are healthy and active well into their 70's and 80's and I have no reason to believe that will not be the case with us since we are both in good health and take care of ourselves. It just seems somewhat risky to wait and not carpe diem for the sake of a few thousand dollars a month.

This whole line of thinking is weird and depressing. I feel like even thinking about this is killing us off before our time. But on the other hand the idea of freedom for the daily 9-5 work routine makes me happy.

I confess I got kind of excited the other day when he said he thought he would retire at the traditional 65 and maybe I should just retire at the same time. That's only three years away!!!


Friday, July 10, 2009

RE: But Is It Art?



Lorimarsha has an interesting post on her blog (link on the bloglist to the left) from Denis Dutton's book The Art Instinct listing some criteria for determining what is art. Even though I ask that question myself at times I have a visceral negative reaction to those people who look at a piece of art in a gallery or museum and say 'my kid could do that.' If you don't care for the piece or if it doesn't speak to you that's one thing. But the 'my kid could do that' attitude is insulting and dismissive to the artist.

I saw DuChamp's Fountain in the Dada Exhibit both at MOMA and the National Gallery (I thought the National Gallery did a much better job with the exhibit). I agree with Dutton that as as a Dadaist gesture, it is brilliant.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Infectoid




So last week I had a bit of oral surgery and I have felt kind of under the weather since. Not really sick or feverish or anything - no pig flu - just out of sorts with a side helping of more pain than I would have expected. Today I had my stitches removed and lo and behold, I have a bit of infection (despite 5 days of antibiotics). So more antibiotics for another 5 days and hopefully that will get rid of it.

Random thoughts:

Sarah Palin: 'I'm not a quitter. I'm proving that by quitting."

Joe Biden: Biden speaks, Obama walks back what Biden says. Getting to be a pattern.

Jodi Rell (governor of CT): I thought she was kind of harmless when she took over after Rowland went to jail. Not so much, her policies are terrible.

Example of weird English on a t-shirt from Japan. It says 'Precious', 'Unbreakable', 'Realize'. The circle says 'There is no precious time like the present'. I have no comment. I think the shirt says it all. BTW, Char is the model.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Just Plain Dumb


This guy is definitely in the running for the Darwin Award:
NORTH HAVEN — A man who allegedly used a shotgun to try to get rid of a tree limb in his backyard has been arrested.Antonio Chiaia, 74, of 9 Cricket Court, was arrested at his home Saturday morning after a neighbor reported he was discharging a shotgun in his yard, Capt. James Merrithew said.Chiaia told police he could not reach the tree limb with a saw, so he was trying to remove it by shooting at it. The branch is still there, Merrithew said.The gun, a double-barrel 12-gauge, was seized, and Chiaia was charged with unlawful discharge of a firearm and second-degree reckless endangerment. He is scheduled to appear July 16 in Superior Court in Meriden.

I'm Still Dressing Like It Is Winter



This is my Wardrobe_Remix photo for today - July 7 - in the Northern Hemisphere - where it is supposed to be summer. I am so jealous of other people's summery outfits. I think Mother Nature has abandoned us to her Evil Twin. I can count the nice weather days on the fingers on one hand. Save us from this madness!!!




Monday, June 29, 2009

Red Purse

I have been on a quest for a red purse. I had two requirements - cheap and preferably vegan and vintage - okay that's maybe three. Not that I am rabidly anti-leather, I wear leather but not all the time. And not that I am committed to all things vintage but for something I will only use occasionally (I like to rotate my bags but not necessarily in a 'matchy-matchy to the outfit' way), I think it is entirely reasonable to reuse something that already exists rather than buy something new and encourage the landfill shops (I stole that term from the fabulous Middle-aged Teacher).

So after much searching and a week of it sitting in my Etsy favorites, this is what I decided on. I like the shape, it's kind of unusual and I love the outside pockets for keys, phone, keycard, etc. It's from ThreeChicksVintage on Etsy.com. They have some cool stuff. I hope it gets here soon.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Nothing to blog about


Normally I wait until I actually have something to say before I blog.  That means blog entries are few and far between.  So I decided to blog daily even if it is simply trivia.  Still probably a decent discipline.

It's Tuesday morning.  I haven't left for the office yet because I am waiting for an 8:30 conference call.

Just got a free year's subscription to Lucky magazine because it came free with tee shirts I got Mr. Elfcookie from Amazon.  Hopefully it will still be publishing in a year.

Excited that Gil Simmons on Channel 8 said that actual summer weather is coming.  I am so jealous of the folks in the wardrobe_remix group that can wear cute summer stuff and I'm still dressing for March which is what it feels like - rainy, windy and cold.  

Just saw a really cute photo of a cutoff skirt with safety pins lining the pockets.  Kudos to cuteness.

Speaking of cuteness - can't wait to see Rintarou in the flesh - or at least on Skype for now - in the flesh in August.  We fly to Japan on our second wedding anniversary.  No one can say we don't know how to celebrate!! 15 hour flight - non-stop from JFK to Tokyo.


Sunday, April 26, 2009

How to Feel Like a Criminal



Disclaimer #1:  I think this country's War on Drugs has been a huge money-wasting failure.  This is not just my opinion; the facts have been well documented.

Disclaimer #2: I think meth is an ugly drug and no one should use it.  Ever.  For any reason.

That said, yesterday I went to buy Sudafed to try to de-congest my head, get my eustachian tube functioning and hopefully stop listing to the right when I walk due to dizziness caused by middle-ear problems.  This is the first time I have bought Sudafed in a long time.  When I had Grave's Disease it was verboten.  Since my surgery I can take it now.

Used to be you walked into the store and picked it up off the counter paid for it and went home.  Because it is a key ingredient in the manufacture of meth the procedure is now somewhat different.  Now you pick up a card from the counter and take it to the pharmacy where they proceed to examine your ID and make you sign a book.  Only then will they unlock the secret stash drawer and give you your Sudafed.  I was kind of waiting for the fingerprinting and strip search.  Crazy.

A few weeks ago I had minor dental surgery and the oral surgeon gave me a prescription for Vicodin.  No problem.  Here is your highly addictive pain medication. We don't need to verify that you are the person whose name is on the prescription. We don't have to be sure you are not going to go out and sell the pills on the street.  Just here you go and have a nice day.

But Sudafed on the other hand, is a different story.  Because one ingredient can be used in the manufacture of another drug there must be restrictions.  Ridiculous restrictions but restrictions none the less.  And restrictions that can make a regular person like me feel as if I was doing something nefarious by buying a decongestant.

I was also brought up short a few years ago when using the self-checkout at the supermarket.  Suddenly the computer voice boomed out, 'You are attempting to purchase an age restricted item.  Please wait for cashier to verify your ID.'  Turns out I had a bottle of Robitussin for Mr. Elfcookie's cold-related cough.  Again, I am not 13 years old.  I am not likely to be interested in robo-tripping.  And again, I am being made to feel as if I am doing something nefarious.

I confess, Officer.  I'm guilty.  Of trying to unclog my head.




Tuesday, April 21, 2009

This Is What We Feared

However the Jane Harman affair comes out, this is using wire-tapped conversations for political ends.  This is what we feared would happen. This is what we were assured would not happen.  This is what happened.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Real "Housewives" of NYC - Part the Third

I have to lay off The Countess this week because, although she did not fail to deliver many mock worthy moments, her compatriots have been sadly neglected.  I do have to mention the meeting with the woman who is 'helping her write', aka ghost-writing, her book about All Things Countessy.  As The Countess droned on and on the poor woman looked as if she were wondering what happened to her dreams of life as a writer in New York.  They seemed so bright and shiny back in Creative Writing class.

On to Kelly.  Kelly Horseleatherface of the Sun Damaged Dermis is the 'new' 'housewife'.  A single mother of two girls with strange names, Kelly does something but I'm not sure what.  Apparently she writes for a magazine and plays at making jewelry for 20-something soccer moms to wear out to dinner with their husbands.  I know, it didn't make sense when she said it on TV either.  Oh, and by the way, when your boy toy says in his bumbling English that your applied-with-a-spatula make-up gets all over his face when you smooch?  That's not a good thing.

Kelly and Bethenny have an ongoing bitch fight because Kelly didn't want her name on the invitation for Jill's charity shindig.  Last week, Kelly invited Bethenny for a drink so she could shriek at her about how much she hates her.  Kelly then met the boy toy for another drink and made horse-teefs at him for the rest of the night.

And what the f$%k was she doing running in the middle of the street?  Passersby were turning around - yes, in NYC - to look at the crazy lady running amongst the taxis with a camera crew in the middle of the damn street.  Oh, and she also went with Jill while Jill picked out at $16,000 handbag (Jill explained that what with the economy in the shitter an all, she was being frugal and not getting jewelry for her birthday this year.)

This was birthday week.  Jill's and Alex's.  Jill got the handbag as a gift from her sugar daddy/husband.  Sugarpops also surprised her with a Mercedes SUV.  She bitched because it didn't have an iPhone connector.

On the other side of the bridge in Brooklyn, Simon picked out a paltry pair of cheap-ass earrings (a mere $6K) for Alex.  He then surprised her by taking her home.  Quite the gift for surprise that.  He wigged out in the car because the driver actually took them home instead of driving around the block first just to confuse Alex.  I actually felt bad for Alex.  It was obvious she was embarrassed to tears (literally) but she laughed it off in the joy of being surprised by being taken home to celebrate with cupcakes and the two strange, screaming blond creatures that live in their house.  Must be some sort of exotic Brooklyn house pets.

Friday, April 10, 2009

FAIL!!! The Giant Souvenir Tee Shirt Project












UPDATE:  General consensus was that this was a FAIL.  Oh, well.  At least it didn't matter that there was egg dye on it before the night was done.


I was rooting around in a closet the other day looking for something and I found a couple of old men's XL souvenir tee shirts that I had come to own by various means.  I have all the shirts I need for chores and gardening so before I put them into the Goodwill bin I decided to see if I could improve them and make them into something that could actually be worn in public.

My first attempt is above.  The shirt in question is from a trip to Busch Gardens Williamsburg a dozen years ago.  I got the shirt to commemorate the fact that I was the only one not too scared to go on the roller coasters.  I removed the sleeves and neckband and and used double fold bias tape in co-ordinating colors as trim.

View 1 is as is.  Not sure I like the power rangers shoulders.

View 2 is layered over a long sleeve white tee and a black hoodie.  It's still cool here.  I think I will wear it to egg dyeing tonight.

The other shirt I found is purple (also XL) and says 'Support Your Local Feminist Bookstore' in white.  I'm thinking lace and/or ruffles.


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Real "Housewives" of NYC - Part the Second

Ok, maybe this is the DVR version of live blogging but I can't resist.  Another priceless Countess Moment this week.  The Countess went to Brooklyn (oh my god, she was slumming) to a Girl's Club to teach the 'Smart Girls' about self esteem.

Sadly, before she could begin her schtick, the actual teacher had planned an exercise where each of the girl's wrote at least five things they liked about themselves.  The Countess of course participated and ran out of paper making her list.

1.  The Countess likes that she's 'likable',  Where is she likable? I don't want to go there.
2. The Countess likes that she's 'funny, because (she) likes to tell jokes."  Again, who thinks she's funny?  Laughable, but certainly not funny.
3. The Countess likes that she's 'organized'.  She says this with a crazy-assed scary-eye look.  Monitor the woman's intake of substances made with beans that are grown in South America.

Not five seconds later it starts. 'Do you know anything about me? I'm a countess." Sweet Mother of God what is it with the title, woman?  While some girls' eyes glaze over and other girls' eyes roll uncontrollably, she goes on and on about her (soon-to-be-ex. See Ethiopian sexpot in the previous post) husband's family and the Suez Canal and how he's related to the Statue of Liberty, blah, blah, blah.

After asking them what they would like to do with their lives, she belittles their answers, calling a girl who wants to be a babysitter, 'cute'.  A very overweight 10-year-old who wants to be a model is told that she will certainly be tall enough and has a beautiful face and that the 'losing weight part' is 'easy.' Really? Is it easy?

I never knew the true meaning of 'stunningly oblivious' until the next scene where she blatantly played to racial stereotype by mentioning that she noticed a gym on the way in and of course since the girls like to play basketball, she'd love to go on down to the gym and shoot some hoops with them - which she does - in stilettos - that probably cost what those kids' parents make in a month.

In the face time she reflects that the girls really appreciated her taking time out of her day to spend a few minutes with them to 'help' them.  I feel for those poor girls.  They had to endure an hour of hell with this woman for the sake of TV.  But seriously, there no end to the awfulness that is The Countess?

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Real "Housewives" of NYC - Part the First

Okay, it's my dirty little secret.  I watch this show.  I actually DVR on Tuesday and watch it on Wednesday so I can relax with a glass of wine, watch the show sans commercials and read Richard's hysterical synopsis at Gawker.com in one sitting.  

I tried to watch the RH of Orange County.  I think I made it through part of one episode.  I didn't watch the RH of Atlanta.  But the RH of NY is like a train wreck I can't stop watching.  These women are awful. With the exception of Bethenny I would not want to know any of them.  But I seem to have embraced their horridness and thus my Wednesday night ritual.

For the uninitiated some basics:

Some of these women are wives - Bethenny and Kelly are single - but none of them seem to do anything remotely housewifey.  Unless of course you count shopping, lunching, and bitching about one another. That pretty much sums up every episode.

The Cast:

Bethenny - Top of the list for coolness.  She is some kind of celebrity chef who was on the cover of some snooty magazine in the Hamptons when this season began.  She is totally in your face; a no nonsense, tell-it-like-it-is type.  One reviewer said she functions like a smart-aleck Greek chorus injecting a snarky common sense into the madness generated by her co-stars, the rest of the 'housewives'.

The Countess LuAnn - married to some 3rd rate French Count geezer who is somehow related to the Statue of Liberty. His 4th wife, I believe and in the real world, not the TV world, this week he dumped her via email for a much younger Ethiopian sexpot he was courting in Geneva while his wife was in NYC doing countess-y things on a reality show).  Countess LuAnn believes her lofty position gives her the gravitas to write the soon-to-be-released etiquette tome, "Class With The Countess."  I am not making this up.  

Favorite Countess moment - she and the oft-absent Count (see Ethiopian sexpot reference above) were being honored by some random charity at some random Hamptons shindig.  At her table, The Countess bitched incessantly because the woman who introduced her didn't use the title 'Countess' enough times.  Then, annoyed that the other attendees were talking while the charity woman was speaking, she got up, grabbed the microphone and basically told everyone to shut the f&*k up.  After which she returned to her table and proceeded to talk loudly to her tablemates while the poor charity woman gamely tried to finish her speech.  Bethenny's take: it wasn't very 'countessy' in fact 'it was discountess'.  This is why I love Bethenny.

Second favorite Countess moment: The Discountess's meal ticket (see Ethiopian sexpot reference above)/daughter is off to boarding school in the fall and while it is still summer in the damn Hamptons, Countess LuAnn decides to host a luncheon for the girl and her friends.  About a dozen 14-year-old girls, looking extremely uncomfortable, arrive at the tent where lunch is to be served.  The Discountess's daughter appears to be praying for the Hellmouth to open and loose the demons on them all. 

Instead of the Hellmouth, however, the Discountess's mouth opens and proceeds to berate the poor girls for there abominable etiquette; 'YOU, close your mouth when you chew' - YOU, elbows off the table.' In her face time with the camera she self=righteously explains that she has done these girls a wonderful service by pointing out to them their egregious table manners and they are extraordinarily privileged to be in the presence of A Countess who is willing to help the poor dears. Not all girls are so blessed.  Again, I am not making this up.

Okay so we've covered Bethenny and The Discountess and this post is already way to long.  More to come on Ramona, Alex/Simon, Jill and Kelly Leatherface later.....






Friday, March 13, 2009

YAY! Rupert is Not Sick!!

The vet thinks he is okay.  Maybe a touch of pancreatitis or gastroenteritis.  He suggested I bring in a urine sample in the next few weeks just to be absolutely sure.

The mechanics of getting a urine sample from a dog is puzzling.  The only way I can think of is to chase him with a paper cup and stick it under him when he lifts his leg.  I am sure he will enjoy that immensely.

Any other suggestions??

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Is Rupert Sick?

Rupert is going to the vet tomorrow to be checked for diabetes.  He seems to have some but not all of the symptoms so I think it's a good idea to have him checked out.

Here is what happened.  On Sunday he threw up and didn't eat but was drinking water like crazy.  I thought it was just because he made himself sick on something on Saturday.  He didn't eat until Tuesday but he is still drinking more water than usual.  He ate yesterday and today he threw up again.  He is not acting sick at all though.

Mr. Elfcookie doesn't think it's diabetes.  He says he would be peeing more, eating more, and losing weight in addition to the drinking.  He is not doing any of those things.  Maybe I am just being overcautious.  But diabetes is treatable in dogs if it's caught early so this will not be horrible news.

At any rate he is due for his Lyme Disease booster and we need a replacement rabies tag.

Friday, March 6, 2009

AAHHH!!! SPARKS IN MY BRAIN!!!!!!!


PLUS


PLUGGED INTO THIS

 
IN A VERY DRY HOUSE

EQUALS









Friday, February 27, 2009

Wild Animals are WILD



This is a wild animal.  In this picture the wild chimp is eating a wild monkey.  They are both wild animals.

I've refrained from writing about the chimp incident because too much has already been said and none of it has added much to the conversation.  In addition, lawmakers and politicians frantically are trying to pass monkey legislation on the state and national level.  Suffice it to say the woman had an inappropriate relationship with the chimp (a glass of wine, a bath together, then a snuggle in bed).  But clearly this was a sad, troubled woman; having lost a daughter the chimp filled a void in her life.

But I am not so much focused on the incident, tragic though it was.  I am more concerned with the issue of people keeping inappropriate animals as pets.

Whether we like it or not certain animals at this time are bred primarily as pets.  These are domesticated animals who over a period of time came to prefer living inside and being fed over prowling the countryside and finding their own food.  In exchange for shelter and food they provide humans with companionship.  I don't know what animals experts would consider 'domesticated.'  My list doesn't go far beyond dogs and cats.

Other animals are not domesticated; they are wild.  This category includes chimpanzees and wolves and alligators and countless other animals that live in cages and terrariums

We have an internal social/professional networking site at my company.  I belong to the dog lovers group.  Today, in the midst of a heated exchange about pit bull as pet, someone mentioned a friend who had a timber wolf as a house pet.  It is 98% wolf and the rest is dog.   This person stopped going to the house after the wolf attacked him for the second time.   Apparently owning a timber wolf is legal in their state.  A wolf is not a dog.  A wolf is a wild animal.  Wild animals are not suitable as pets.  

Most of the folks who keep wild animals as pets probably consider themselves animal lovers. However much they say they love animals, they certainly don't respect them.  Respecting an animal involves appreciating it for what it is and where it is most comfortable living according to its own instincts.  It does not include forcing an animal into an environment where its natural instincts are stifled.  Chimps live in the jungle; they don't wear clothes, they don't drink wine out of stemmed wineglasses.  They swing from trees and eat other animals.  They attack when they feel threatened.  No one can train a wild animal to live apart from its instincts, be it a circus, a Las Vegas nightclub act, or a lonely woman who craves a lost child and have it end well for the animal or the handler.

Respecting animals does not involve taking wild animals into our homes and trying to conform them to our wishes.  Respecting animals involves creating conditions where they can live well as what they are.  It involves working to save the rain forests, protecting habitats, opposing offshore drilling, avoiding the products of factory fishing and agribusiness as much as possible. It doesn't necessarily mean becoming vegetarian or vegan although some make that choice. It means being responsible for knowing that the steak you just bought at the supermarket came from a cow who was forced, against its nature, to eat corn instead of grass, and then was shot full of antibiotics to keep it from dying from eating the corn instead of the grass it was designed to eat. It means looking for alternatives, buying fresh and locally whenever possible.

Pets are pets.  For good or ill that is how they have adapted.  Get a dog.  Get 10 if you can responsibly care for ten.  But for all animals' sakes, don't keep wild animals as pets.




Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Please God Let It Be Spring Soon

Pretty pic of sunrise while Rupert was pooping.

Hopefully the pretty picture will offset my depressed, irritated rantings.

I have a question.  What is the purpose of February?  It has Valentine's Day, a day that some people enjoy but others find it heinous.  It has Dead President's, oops, President's Day which is only a holiday if you work in government or banking.  Beyond that the most positive aspect is that it is shorter than the other months.

Above sunset not withstanding, when I look out my front door I see a grim patchwork of dirty snow, muddy grass, and salt and sand covered pavement.  It is still cold although tomorrow is supposed to be 55 F but raining.  But hopefully that will take care of most of the dirty snow.

Anyway, today I am feeling about as grim as the view outside the front door.  I NEED ME SOME SPRING!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Ede and The Esthers

Leaving aside what it says about my 20-year-old self that I preferred the company of my grandmother's friends to friends my own age, my last post got me thinking about my grandmother Ede and The Esthers, Esther K and Esther A.  The Esthers were neighbors and also attended the same small church as my family.  Esther K was a year-round resident; Esther A wintered in Florida.

Esther K taught me to crochet.  Esther A taught me to play canasta.  My grandmother taught me not to put up with shit from men.  Now if you've gone all Friday-Night-Knitting-Club on me and are imagining that sharing-of-female-wisdom-across-the-generations that goes on in all our Book Club books, stop.  Get that image out of your head right now. Mostly we shared snarky gossip about neighbors and fellow church-goers and I complained about my seemingly endless supply of loser boyfriends (I didn't listen so well to Nana in those days.)

Even more entertaining was that my grandmother was always mad at one or both of The Esthers.  Frequently The Esthers were mad at each other and tried to recruit my grandmother and me to one or the other side.  Usually it started on the phone.  One of them took offense at some minor, and I do mean minor, slight, hung up on the other, and they were off and running. I'd listen to my grandmother's version of the conversation in apparently perfect word-for-word detail.  Later on I'd wander over to visit whichever Esther was the offender/offended to get her side.  It still amazes me that women in their seventies could act like such middle-schoolers. Ede complained that Esther A called Esther K on Monday and Tuesday but didn't call her until Wednesday.  Esther K complained that Esther A was so busy at church introducing her house guest to the pastor that she didn't introduce the guest to her.  Esther K and Ede thought Esther A 'put on airs'.  Esther A thought Esther K was bossy.  The Esthers thought Ede was a busybody. 

These women were in their eighth decade, not in eighth grade.

I guess if there was any wisdom to be learned from my time with Ede and The Esthers beyond how to crochet, how to play canasta, and not to take shit from men, it is that being old doesn't automatically mean being grown up - and I don't mean that in a necessarily good way.  As I move closer to their age that may be an important lesson.

Handicrafty


Apropos of nothing other than the mere fact that I haven't posted for an obscene length of time,  I discovered yesterday that I remember how to crochet.  It has been at least 20 years since I crocheted anything - and back then it was delicate doilies and antimacassars, but the above is my double crochet - maybe not perfect but pretty darn good for not having picked up a hook in a while.

I have also been re-teaching myself how to knit and that is having mixed results.  I did knit much less than I crocheted so I think muscle memory is key here.  Of course, yesterday when I tried to figure out how to do a double crochet stitch I immediately went to the illustration and written directions.  After a half hour of failure and frustration I took a deep breath, closed the instruction book, and using what I had gleaned from the previous half hour, sat back and relied on muscle memory.  Before I knew it I had finished a whole row.

But I think the fact that crochet comes more easily to me is based a lot on who taught me.  My grandmother crocheted but her friend, Esther K. (as opposed to Esther A.) taught me.  I sat in her living room hours during breaks from college while she taught me how to make my afghans rectangular instead of 'blobular' and fed me tea and cookies.

When someone attempts to teach a family member, higher than normal expectations combine with higher than normal desire to please to create at best, an unstable learning environment.  I am definitely a better crochet-er because of  Esther K.  The knitting I will have to master on my own.